I haven't blogged in a little while, mainly because life has been a little crazy. There will be more life changes in the near future, but no idea when that will become announcable :)
My friend and I were talking about what it takes to be an Army wife. This is near and dear to my heart, due to the fact that I am an Army wife. I kinda like to think of myself as the non-traditional Army wife, I like that!
It takes a certain type to be successful at being an Army wife (military wife in general, you can replace Army with any other branch of service.). There are certain things we deal with on a very regular basis that the "normal" wife may not. Some examples:
I have one neighbor whose husband is in the band...he may have gigs at night, parades in the morning, formal events he has to play for, and funeral detail (since he is a bugler).
I have another neighbor whose husband is getting ready to go to the field. She said the last time he went they ended up leaving a day earlier than planned.
Before Rick deployed, he spent a month training in CA. Before they deploy again, the guys will spend another month training somewhere.
Rick is about to go to school for a month.
Another friend's husband just got done with the initial training to get into the Army, she has two kids and he was away for about six months.
Finally, another friend's husband has been working hard at getting qualified for different things, which means schools, training, and long hours.
Some things other people don't know. The guys have to pull "Staff duty". This is a 24 hour assignment where they have to stay on duty to answer the phones and handle other things that come up at the office.
Duty days start at 0600 with PT. Sometimes the day doesn't end until well after dark.
If something goes missing, everyone has to stay to look for it, no matter how long that takes.
Things change, constantly!
So, what does that mean for the wife!? It means she needs to be somewhat independent. I have to tell you, I am can be over-dependent on some things and under-dependent on others. I don't like when Rick is away, I have trouble with the change (since I am a crazy controller!) I am very under-dependent when it comes to work. I have a career I love and feel satisfied with.
I have friends, I have things to do, hobbies, and love the benefits of meeting new people, trying new things, and learning about a culture!
I will admit I am over-dependent sometimes. I like to have Rick home for dinner, I love supporting him with family readiness group activities, I ask him if it is ok if I do certain things, I work with him to make our house a home.
I learned how much I could handle when he was deployed. It was extremely difficult. I was so anxious about the whole thing, but I knew that he needed me to be strong and to handle things. I knew that I could not bog him down with the worries of my daily life.
It is hard to adjust, the best medicine is to look at the positive. If you are stuck in the house, get out and meet people. If you are stressed with the kids, there are so many options! Moms NEED me time! Couples NEED date time! Kids need healthy parents with a healthy relationship.
If you are having trouble with the military life, find a mentor who can help you look at the bright side, listen to her and don't be a negative Nancy! We do have a great life, so few people get to live a life like us. Trust me, the outside is not all it's cracked up to be!
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