Life is uncertain now and, as those of you who know me know, this is driving me crazy!!!! I love the chance to move, meet new people, show H more of the world, and expand our lives! I am terrified about finding a house, getting all our stuff there, and FINDING A JOB!!
So, while in this craziness, I am dealing with my crabby baby missing her daddy. I know that life is great and we have so much to be thankful for. I am so thankful for so many things. I have a lot to do, think about, plan, not worry about, and all that.
I gave my resume to our director to ask her to think of forwarding it to the people who work in the same type office as we do, just over there. I also am applying for a job I found online there too. I don't know, just all this uncertainty makes my stomach hurt.
I will focus on the positive though because that is what I need to do. I have been selling a TON of our stuff and have more to sell. The money is nice, but it is a double edge sword.
It is extremely hard for me to let go of things. I am not real sure where this comes from. I really hate that I assign sentimental value to things that don't need to have that assigned. I broke down over selling the car seat, I am possessive over H's old clothes that she cannot wear anymore, I have a whole rubbermaid tub of wedding stuff that I don't even know why I have, like a table cloth that has stained over the last 3 years. I need to let go!
I like off loading, I know we are going to have a small space, so I need to downsize. I think the ironfistedness may be attributable to living in the same house my whole life. H is about to move more than I did as a child, and she isn't even 2. Maybe I want to keep all our things close because I want her to have childhood things and to be able to have memories. I know she will have that all over, just have to think of it as an adventure.
Anyway, I am off to get more sleep so that I can be better rested to handle all this stress and anxiety :)
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
Sunday, November 11, 2012
Positive Thinking
We have all heard how positive thinking helps those who are sick to recover, or recover faster. Why is it that we disregard this so easily in our daily life? Why is it so easy to get bogged down in the negative.
It is currently November 2012. Everyday this month, I and many of my friends, have been posting what we are thankful for each day on Facebook. Why do we just wait for November?
Today is actually Veteran's Day. What does that mean? That means, today is a special day to set apart a small portion of our time to thank a veteran who sacrificed for our freedom. According to usmilitary.com, "Many Americans mistakenly believe that Veterans Day is the day America sets aside to honor American military personnel who died in battle or as a result of wounds sustained from combat. That's not quite true. Memorial Day is the day set aside to honor America's war dead.
It is currently November 2012. Everyday this month, I and many of my friends, have been posting what we are thankful for each day on Facebook. Why do we just wait for November?
Today is actually Veteran's Day. What does that mean? That means, today is a special day to set apart a small portion of our time to thank a veteran who sacrificed for our freedom. According to usmilitary.com, "Many Americans mistakenly believe that Veterans Day is the day America sets aside to honor American military personnel who died in battle or as a result of wounds sustained from combat. That's not quite true. Memorial Day is the day set aside to honor America's war dead.
Veterans Day, on the other hand, honors ALL American veterans, both living and dead. In fact, Veterans Day is largely intended to thank LIVING veterans for dedicated and loyal service to their country."
These men and women dedicated themselves for loyal service to their country! That means something to me. As the wife of one, that is pretty spot on! My husband is dedicated to his job and his country. I cannot have anything but pride for that!
So, how does that affect my positive thinking? I will admit, I suffer a lot from negative self talk. I know that I have a long way to grow on feeling good enough and doing the right thing. However, I do know how important positive thinking is.
I was talking to my mom the other day about depression. We talked about being happy where you are and the only one who can get you there is YOU! I know that is really hard to do that, but it is possible.
I remember going through panic attacks and depression while Rick was deployed. Before he was going I remember talking to my mom about the fact that he was going to a country with people who's job is was to kill him, and they had never met him. This was terrifying.
How do you get over that? I started thinking of the WWII wives who didn't even know if their husband was alive, where he was, what was happening, or anything of the like. This gave me strength knowing that if they could do it, I could do it.
I have been told that since I like Army life, my experiences and thought process about the Army is different. I would say, it doesn't have to be. Even if you hate the situation you are in, you have to look at what you can change about it. I knew that I could not bring Rick home, so I had to accept him being gone. I knew I couldn't go home to be by family all the time because I had to work, so I started to find things here that brought enjoyment. I started hanging out with positive people who would help keep my mind off things that were terrible and also understand my fear of Rick not coming home alive.
My dad calls these people "attic people". I love that idea. He says that you need to hang around attic people rather than basement people. I know, personally, it is easy for me to be a basement person, so I have to focus on the positive.
Positive thinking also helps in a marriage. When I stopped focusing on where Rick fell short and started to focus on where he exceeds my expectations, we formed a much happier marriage.
My goal this week is to focus on the positive, be slow to anger, and abounding in love. I know tomorrow is going to be hard because Rick is going to leave again. Halaina will be a wreck because she will feel abandoned, but I have to focus on the great weekend we had, the fact that he is growing as a person while he is gone, and that he will be home again in 10 days for another weekend. It is easy to focus on the fact that he has been gone most of the last month and will be gone for most of the rest of this month, but I know he misses us as much as we do him and we can do nothing to change the situation, so I am not going to worry about it.
Positive thinking! It's essential to any life.
Wednesday, November 7, 2012
Post Election
Caution! This is an opinion piece and if you do not like the opinion, I am sorry.
Today is the day after the 2012 presidential election. I woke up to a text from my very best friend Laura saying "did you see the election results?" to which I replied, Nope, fell asleep. Just a little background, Laura and I have very similar political beliefs.
I immediately went to Facebook, but it wasn't loading. So, I went to Google and googled "2012 election results" there is was, President Barack Obama, with 303 electoral votes. Ugh. I replied to Laura, That sucks.
I have to explain why I said that. I have a degree in Political Science, so I am very connected to the importance of voting. I also understand the limitations on what a president can actually do. I know that a lot of the things presidential candidates claim they will do x, y, and z, but only really the authority to change w. One thing presidents do though is appoint a cabinet, those people do make a difference.
So, why was I disappointed in the choice of the nation? I had a conversation with a few different friends, and I have said pretty much the same thing each time. I felt I knew who I was going to vote for before the first debate. After the first debate, I was certain.
Some of the reasons I decided to vote for Romney:
-my pay has been frozen for the last 2 years and is scheduled to be frozen again this year. Why does that matter? At least I have a job. That is very true, but when they froze our pay the first time, it was January of 2010. In January 2010, the average gas price was $2.67/gallon, the average price for a gallon of milk was $2.79. In January 2011, the average gas price was $3.52/gallon, the average price of a gallon of milk was $3.96. In 2012, the average gas price was $3.97/gallon, the average price of a gallon of milk was $3.63. So as you can see, having your pay frozen does affect people.
-My husband is a soldier, Obama is planning to cut 100,000 troops. That is a big deal, if my husband does not have a job, our income goes down drastically, plus we will have to pay almost 15 times more in health insurance (probably more than that), we will pay more for our rent, and go through the stress of an unemployed family member.
-No worries though because unemployment has been extended to like 2 years. The unemployment rate is at almost 9%, and the lets add 100,000 discharged soldiers to that number and see how easy it is to get a job
-Why is it hard to get a job, Obama is not small business friendly. When creating his requirements, such as Obamacare, he penalizes small businesses. If the business cannot afford the employees they have, they are not going to be hiring anyone, vet or not.
-Obamacare! UGH! I have a huge problem with socialist health care. I have lived in Germany twice now, about to be three times. I have gone to the German doctor and waited in the waiting room for hours for a doctor who doesn't really care the difference in people or illnesses because they get paid the same regardless. The quality of care is less. Oh, and again, the attack on the small business owner.
-I didn't know much about this until our pastor talked about it at church one Sunday and I started listening a little closer. No one in the history of the world has survived taking on Israel. The US is starting to have strained relations with Israel. that does not fair well for us.
-Immigration, the fact that we are allowing work permits when we don't have enough jobs for our people.
-Bailouts. Really, I do not agree with the idea that anything is too big to fail. We have gone through a depression before and everyone was poor. Why is that not the case now.
The list goes on.
One thing that has really frustrated me is the idea that I don't like this presidential candidate because of his skin color. That could not be further from the truth. I do not care what color you are, if you are the wrong choice for our country, I am not going to vote for you. I do not think his policy is like others. I think he double speaks, I question his values, and I dislike the fact that he doesn't seem transparent.
I think it is very interesting that Romney won more states, and most of the Midwest, middle states. I know many people hate the electoral college, but I do see the need for it, so that everyone has a somewhat fair shake. I do wish more states did like Maine does with dividing the electoral votes by congressional district so that things like Ohio don't happen. Most of Ohio voted Red, but the cities voted Blue.
I don't think the new president will be any different than he was last, possibly worse.
I am also very disappointed with those on both sides of this vote. Those that voted for Romney are very upset with the ending result. I agree that it is disappointing, but we need to be gracious losers. But the Obama supporters must have forgotten how they reacted when Bush 2 was reelected in 2004. It seemed there were pretty much exactly the same comments after that election. I think it is terrible to sling mud at either of them.
I fear our future. I am afraid of a depression, revolution, attack, etc. I am about to move to Germany where the dollar is only worth .73 Euros. This is devastating since we are paid in dollars.
That is all I am going to say. I did not get a new boss last night, so I will press on with the boss I have had. I will do the best I can to be the best citizen I can. I am going to contact my congress people to express what I feel should change. I will continue to be proud to be an American, but I will be cautious of our future.
Today is the day after the 2012 presidential election. I woke up to a text from my very best friend Laura saying "did you see the election results?" to which I replied, Nope, fell asleep. Just a little background, Laura and I have very similar political beliefs.
I immediately went to Facebook, but it wasn't loading. So, I went to Google and googled "2012 election results" there is was, President Barack Obama, with 303 electoral votes. Ugh. I replied to Laura, That sucks.
I have to explain why I said that. I have a degree in Political Science, so I am very connected to the importance of voting. I also understand the limitations on what a president can actually do. I know that a lot of the things presidential candidates claim they will do x, y, and z, but only really the authority to change w. One thing presidents do though is appoint a cabinet, those people do make a difference.
So, why was I disappointed in the choice of the nation? I had a conversation with a few different friends, and I have said pretty much the same thing each time. I felt I knew who I was going to vote for before the first debate. After the first debate, I was certain.
Some of the reasons I decided to vote for Romney:
-my pay has been frozen for the last 2 years and is scheduled to be frozen again this year. Why does that matter? At least I have a job. That is very true, but when they froze our pay the first time, it was January of 2010. In January 2010, the average gas price was $2.67/gallon, the average price for a gallon of milk was $2.79. In January 2011, the average gas price was $3.52/gallon, the average price of a gallon of milk was $3.96. In 2012, the average gas price was $3.97/gallon, the average price of a gallon of milk was $3.63. So as you can see, having your pay frozen does affect people.
-My husband is a soldier, Obama is planning to cut 100,000 troops. That is a big deal, if my husband does not have a job, our income goes down drastically, plus we will have to pay almost 15 times more in health insurance (probably more than that), we will pay more for our rent, and go through the stress of an unemployed family member.
-No worries though because unemployment has been extended to like 2 years. The unemployment rate is at almost 9%, and the lets add 100,000 discharged soldiers to that number and see how easy it is to get a job
-Why is it hard to get a job, Obama is not small business friendly. When creating his requirements, such as Obamacare, he penalizes small businesses. If the business cannot afford the employees they have, they are not going to be hiring anyone, vet or not.
-Obamacare! UGH! I have a huge problem with socialist health care. I have lived in Germany twice now, about to be three times. I have gone to the German doctor and waited in the waiting room for hours for a doctor who doesn't really care the difference in people or illnesses because they get paid the same regardless. The quality of care is less. Oh, and again, the attack on the small business owner.
-I didn't know much about this until our pastor talked about it at church one Sunday and I started listening a little closer. No one in the history of the world has survived taking on Israel. The US is starting to have strained relations with Israel. that does not fair well for us.
-Immigration, the fact that we are allowing work permits when we don't have enough jobs for our people.
-Bailouts. Really, I do not agree with the idea that anything is too big to fail. We have gone through a depression before and everyone was poor. Why is that not the case now.
The list goes on.
One thing that has really frustrated me is the idea that I don't like this presidential candidate because of his skin color. That could not be further from the truth. I do not care what color you are, if you are the wrong choice for our country, I am not going to vote for you. I do not think his policy is like others. I think he double speaks, I question his values, and I dislike the fact that he doesn't seem transparent.
I think it is very interesting that Romney won more states, and most of the Midwest, middle states. I know many people hate the electoral college, but I do see the need for it, so that everyone has a somewhat fair shake. I do wish more states did like Maine does with dividing the electoral votes by congressional district so that things like Ohio don't happen. Most of Ohio voted Red, but the cities voted Blue.
I don't think the new president will be any different than he was last, possibly worse.
I am also very disappointed with those on both sides of this vote. Those that voted for Romney are very upset with the ending result. I agree that it is disappointing, but we need to be gracious losers. But the Obama supporters must have forgotten how they reacted when Bush 2 was reelected in 2004. It seemed there were pretty much exactly the same comments after that election. I think it is terrible to sling mud at either of them.
I fear our future. I am afraid of a depression, revolution, attack, etc. I am about to move to Germany where the dollar is only worth .73 Euros. This is devastating since we are paid in dollars.
That is all I am going to say. I did not get a new boss last night, so I will press on with the boss I have had. I will do the best I can to be the best citizen I can. I am going to contact my congress people to express what I feel should change. I will continue to be proud to be an American, but I will be cautious of our future.
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