Stress part 1

I haven't blogged in a little while, maybe that is one of the reasons I am so stressed.  I have so much in this head!

Today, I got our Christmas cards in the mail, I am so excited!!!  I have to write our Christmas letter so that I can get these in the mail!

I completed two baby blankets last week, but they still have to get mailed. 

I have been so busy with life.  We are getting ready to move and that is so stressful.  It is even more stressful when going overseas and dealing with the Army move.  H is going to love it, but we have to get through the transition first.  One thing that makes me so sad about the move is that I am going to wait to potty train H until we get to Germany so that we don't have to deal with regression.  I know I will not have patience with regression.

More about the stress!  I am finishing up the quarter for school.  I have to get an A on the last two assignment in order to get an A in the class...that gives me major anxiety because one of the assignments is a group project and we got a B on the last one!

In about a week, I turn 30!  I remember around this time last year, my friend Sarah started freaking out about her 30th (which didn't come until January).  I was doing fine with it until December 1st.  Ugh!  Then I was talking to my mom and she asked me what I wanted for my birthday, I told her not to be 30!  I know I should worry about it and I am still so young, but boy does it feel like a turning point in my life.  I still have 32 years of work left, so that isn't very encouraging.  I do want another child though and that gives me anxiety thinking about how old I will be when he/she graduates from high school.  But my mom was 34, so I can do this.

I have to say that my life is probably better than I expected it to be at 30.  When you are a kid, you are going to be married, out of college, with a job, and at least one kid by 22...I accomplished one of those things.  I graduated college at 22, and had a job, so I guess that was 2.  I didn't get married until 25 and becoming a mother until 28.  I know that isn't old, but when you are the oldest new mother on the maternity floor, it kinda hits you.

I feel like there is no excuse for being immature or making stupid decisions because we are grown and need to be true adults.  I know that is also very stupid, but yet how I feel. 

I am going to have to continue to work on letting go.  There is nothing I can do to stop December 14th from getting here.  I cannot do anything to stop time, or even slow it down.  So I am going to enjoy what I have and look forward to what will come.  I have an amazing family, job, life.  I am going to take a few deep breaths, pour myself a glass of wine and continue watching the Wonder Pets with my little family.